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Sick and tired? Detoxify your relationships

February 9, 2012 by Madison Leonard

It’s that time of the semester again. Sniffley-faced peers are snatching up Jamba immunity boosters in yesterday’s sweats and glaring at the sunshine outside as if it were mocking their very existence. While crummy diets and irregular sleep schedules get the blame for typical college student sickness, researchers last week reported that poor physical health can now be linked to negative relationships. That’s right, Britney Spears may have been onto something. Your toxic relationships could be making you sick.

The University of California, Los Angeles, just released a study that tested 122 healthy young people by having them write in diaries — the tried and true method of scientific research — about all of their social interactions over an eight-day period. They then compared the diary records to chemical swabs and found that those who had experienced more negative contact over that week reflected consistently higher numbers of two very specific pro-inflammatory proteins.

And as “Science News” reports, these chemicals aren’t messing around. The proteins are linked to high blood pressure, heart disease, depression and cancer.

According to evolution, the proteins were programmed into our bodies throughout evolution as part of the “fight or flight” response to stressful situations. Preparing for the worst, like a blow to the head, our bodies pump out the proteins to begin cushioning our body against possible injury. But as it turns out, most of us aren’t running from predators anymore. Well, maybe just figuratively.

It seems that competing for attention at work, fretting over a high maintenance roommate or struggling with a demanding significant other can not only wreck you emotionally, but physically as well.

Author of “Toxic People,” Dr. Lillian Glass warns that interactions with a myriad of frustrating people in your life can even be the root of ongoing health problems like migraines, eye-twitches, skin rashes and eating disorders.

So maybe we’re missing the point here. With so much thought and energy (and Pinterest board space) dedicated to finding new healthy recipes and miracle workouts to boost health and physique, perhaps we are missing the real source. Many may not expect that their social interactions heavily impact their physical health too. So what do we do now?

It’s time that we assess with whom we are surrounding ourselves. In most cases, we can’t control how our bosses, professors or family members behave toward us, but we do have complete control over who we choose as friends.

To help determine which people may be hindering your personal life, Cheryl Richardson, a life coach featured on the “Oprah Winfrey Show,” explained that there are several toxic giveaway qualities: The Blamer, the Drainer, the Shamer, the Discounter and the Gossip. All true to their titles, these people will surely curb your confidence and snowball the stress in your life. And as it’s now being shown, that ramped up emotional stress will march right into your physical wellbeing.

Once you’ve pegged one of these relationships in your life, it’s confrontation time. No, a formal sit-down mediation may not be necessary, but communicating your strain is the only way to a happier and healthier you. If you feel like the bond is worth salvaging, then a bit of awkwardness in confronting this individual should pay off in the end.

Relationship specialists, self-proclaimed experts and Oprah all agree. These toxic relationships are one-way tickets to both emotional and physical misery. So in this lovey-dovey Valentine’s season, take some time to assess the relationships in your life before you suffer from a real broken heart.

Filed Under: Perspectives

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