Hey Israel (can I call you Izzy?), it’s been awhile since we last settled down and had a heart-to-heart chat about reality. How’ve you been? We’re ok, save for our $1 trillion plus national debt, economic fragility and overspending on military budgets (which is finally getting a trim courtesy of the Obama Administration).
Listen, we need to talk about Iran. We (as in, certain concerned citizens of the United States of America) can’t help but notice that you’ve been really upping tensions between Iran and the rest of the world with your antics. And by “antics,” we mean “targeted assassinations.”
Now, I won’t say that you were the ones responsible for blowing up the car of a prominent Iranian nuclear scientist, thereby killing him and his driver. I won’t say that because everyone else is saying that already, from intelligence and security experts in Washington to the Iranian government, which is now threatening revenge assassinations.
You also haven’t made any move to deny it, and in fact have continued to be even more openly aggressive towards Iran since the killing. I also can’t help but notice that at least five prominent Iranian scientists connected with Iran’s nuclear program have been killed since 2007 in a similar manner.
I realize the idea of Iran getting the bomb is scary, but wisdom tells us acting out of fear almost invariably leads to violence. Violent aggression in response to Iran’s accelerating nuclear program will not stop the program. It may slow it, which is obviously what you’re betting on, but on the other hand it will make the guys who are pursuing nuclear weapons capability hate you even more than they already do.
Now, what I won’t say is that you are the sole party responsible for this covert aggression within the Islamic Republic. The United States, though we’ve sworn up and down that we haven’t carried out any covert operations, has probably carried out a few. That’s something that, ideally, we wouldn’t do —unfortunately, as is the trend in American foreign policy decisions of late, we frequently do things abroad that we probably shouldn’t do. An intervention is clearly needed.
Not to mention, (and I really feel like I’m pointing out the obvious here) if you decide to declare war on Iran (which you’re chomping at the bit to do; we can see that) we want to make one thing very clear: The United States (AKA your only ally and supporter on the planet) cannot afford to back you up. We simply do not have the funding, or the resolve for a war with a state like Iran, much less if it becomes nuclear.
If there are any adults left in Washington, then there will not be a coordinated military strike on Iran’s uranium enrichment facilities, and President Barack Obama will continue to play the delicate game that he’s been playing for the past couple of months, to positive effect. Words, more than targeted killings, will be the key to assuring stability in the Middle East, as well as the security of everyone, including you.
Iran has threatened, and may eventually close the Straight of Hormuz, through which a sizable portion of the world’s oil supply passes, basically pinching people at the pumps on every continent. And if Iran decided, once it had the bomb, to bully its neighbors in the region by holding that ultimate destructive force over their heads, no one would be surprised.
That is why this column is “From: Everyone,” because the entire world has a stake in whether or not Iran decides to declare a “War on Everyone,” not just you, Israel.
