There is not a “How to…” book on helping kids cope with the trauma of the Franklin and Palisades fires.
To overcome uncertainty, there are bits and pieces of advice that parents and local child experts can piece together as a community to overcome the challenges from the recent emergencies.
Clinical Child Psychologist Genevieve Skale said some benefits come from a large population going through shared trauma when it comes to the child’s coping process.
“The community coming together will be protective compared to a single family that goes through individual trauma,” Skale said.
While each family and each child is different based on age and circumstances, there are some patterns in behaviors that can come up for children facing trauma, Skale said. A combination of honesty, routine and finding community can have positive results for the emotional and physical health of children and teenagers after the recent fires, many child experts say.
Finding normalcy at school in Gan Malibu Preschool, spending time with friends at Malibu Pacific Church youth group events and riding waves with the Malibu Sharks have all been resources for Malibu and Palisades children and teenagers to rise from the ashes.
Facing the Aftermath of the Fires
Whether a child lost their home, had to evacuate from their neighborhood or saw the nearby fires on the news, it was nearly impossible for local parents to shelter their kids from the Franklin and Palisades fires, Skale said.
Honesty is the best policy when parents face questions from their kids about the fires, Skale said.
“Honesty and openness are going to be more beneficial to a child,” Skale said.
While the Pacific Coast Highway is still closed to the general public, soft openings allow residents in the affected area, according to CalTrans.
Each family who calls the destroyed area home should handle returning to their home differently based on age and behavior, Skale said.
Skale said there is no exact answer for how much of the affected area parents should let their children see, but it is something they should be mindful of.
“It’s all about striking a balance of how much is too much,” Skale said.
Sarah Cunin, director of Gan Malibu Preschool, said her strategy is to not talk about the fires unless one of the children asks.
“We try not to discuss it in front of the children to scare them,” Cunin said.
With that being said questions do come up, including ones about the burn scar that is about 25 feet from the building that is located directly across PCH from The Malibu Pier, Cunin said.
When fire-related questions come up, Cunin said she and her staff handle them with care.
“We don’t stop it [the questioning], but then we do try to focus it in positive ways,” Cunin said.
Different age groups will cope with the fires in different ways. The majority of newborns to 6 year olds will not be able to communicate their feelings verbally, Skale said.
“They will rely on their behaviors to communicate,” Skale said.
Cunin said kids at Gans Malibu Preschool have changed their type of play since the fires.
“They are playing evacuation, you know, and they are packing their stuff,” Cunin said.
Trauma responses will be different in the 7 year old to teenager range, Skale said.
“They can have difficulty engaging in routines or activities they previously enjoyed,” Skale said.
This age group is able to better communicate their feelings and anxieties with words than younger children, so it is important that parents listen to their children and give them space to voice their emotions, Skale said.
Get Kids Back in a Routine
Local children affected by the fires in some cases have had to change their school, sports and activities schedules to adapt to the implications of the Franklin or Palisades fires, Skale said.
Finding structure is routine in places where families can be beneficial, Skale said.
One way to do that is for parents to implement one-on-one time, with no distractions, with their child as often as possible, Skale said.
“Caregivers should make space and time on a regular basis to spend time with their kids,” Skale said.
This can provide a designated time for children to feel comfortable with opening up about how they are feeling and ask questions if they have any, Skale.
Another space for consistency is school, Cunin said.
“We’re the stability,” Cunin said.
Package ran live on NewsWaves 32 on Feb. 25.
When the implications of the fires can make children feel like everything is changing, school is something that can stay the same, if their school is safe for return, Cunin said.
“Having their friends and having all their same teachers and all that gives them a sense of normalcy,” Cunin said.
Throughout the Franklin and Palisades fires, officials from Malibu Pacific Church were intentional with keeping their youth programs active.
Stewart Cox, student ministries director at Malibu Pacific Church, said they had to get creative to keep the consistency of their program while their church was affected by the Franklin and Palisades Fires.
“We weren’t able to meet, after the Palisades Fire, at our church, but man, we stormed In-N-Out,” Cox said.
Keeping the consistency of the meetings was crucial when everything else seemed unpredictable, Cox said.
“There has to be some elements of normalcy in our community to anchor ourselves,” Cox said.
Kids and Teens Serve Others to Help Cope
Taylor Walling, lead minister of Waves Church, said the Franklin Fire led to a teaching moment of service for his 8 year old son and 5 year old daughter.
After coping with evacuating from the home on Pepperdine’s campus to Waves Cafe, the Walling family started to hear bad news from the Palisades Fire, Walling said.
“We started getting word that there were students in both our kids’ classes that lost homes in the [Palisades] fire,” Walling said.
Package ran live on NewsWaves 32 on Feb. 11.
Walling said he and his wife gathered some donations for their children’s classmates from Webster Elementary School, and explained what they were doing to their own kids.
“[We were] Saying, ‘Hey, these are things that we own, and are going to clean and give because some of your classmates need it more than we do,’” Walling said.
Serving others and the Palisades community is something that has been beneficial for high school students as well.
Yasmine and Alessandra Santini, twins and Palisades Charter High School juniors, said they called their friend Lily Yadegar, Palisades Charter High School freshman, the day after their school was damaged by the Palisades Fire with a plan.
“I got a call from the two of them, [saying] we really want to do something,” Yadegar said. “We really want to raise money.”
This idea turned into an organization called PaliStrong with a GoFundMe that raised nearly $40,000 dollars that will go directly to rebuilding Palisades Charter High School, the co-founders of PaliStrong said.
PaliStrong has turned into much more than a donation link, Yadegar said.
“It grew into something more than that,” Yadegar said. “It was a lot about community building and how we all need to be there for one another.”
The co-founders of PaliStrong have put together community-bonding events to help fellow students and families cope with the recent trauma that struck their the Palisades, Yasmine said.
The events include a benefit concert, a therapy event and donation drives, the co-founders of PaliStrong said.
This service has helped Alessandra Santini work through the emotions connected to the fire on a personal level.
“It really helped me individually, kind of shifting the fires from a negative thing to a positive thing to learn about resilience and optimism,” Alessandra Santini said.
Physical and Emotional Benefits Come from an Active Community
Community comes in all shapes and sizes, but psychiatrist Jeannie Bujdos said it holds great value when overcoming trauma.
A common type of community for children is a sports team, and Bujdos said this camaraderie is comforting for kids.
“[Kids can] establish a sense of connection with this community, so it’s not like this is me and a group of survivors, like this is my team,” Bujdos said.
Joe Rickabaugh, Malibu Sharks surf coach, said it has been great for his youth surf team to get back in the water together after the Franklin and Palisades fires kept them out of the waves for five weeks.
Getting outside with peers is something Rickabaugh said is helpful for his young surfers.
“Once it’s all said and done and the fires are out there’s nothing better than getting outside and getting in nature,” Rickabaugh said.
Package ran live on NewsWaves on March 18.
Bujdos said there are also physical benefits to getting active with a community after a traumatic experience.
Bujdos said research shows individuals’ brains can get stuck in fight or flight mode after enduring trauma.
“If you are overcoming a trauma, your brain is stuck in this loop of thinking about this stressor,” Bujdos said. “You’re feeling like you are back in the sense of that traumatic experience.”
Bujdos said exercise helps stimulate the growth of new neurons and brain growth.
“Stimulating more brain growth leads to branching out from that pathway, that loop that their mind is stuck in.” Bujdos said.
Getting active with a team or a group can provide space for children to engage in mindfulness activities.
Getting out with a surf team or just hanging by the beach can be the perfect time to engage in one of Bujdos’s favorite grounding techniques.
“Let’s think of five things we see, four things we can hear, three things we can touch, two things we can smell and one thing we can taste,” Bujdos said.
These grounding techniques allow children and teens to step away from negative thoughts and flashbacks, according to Medical News Today.
Getting back outside and being with a team can have positive mental and physical benefits for kids dealing with the effects of the recent fires, but if children are continuing to struggle, Bujdos said parents should consider taking their kid to see a professional for cognitive or behavioral psychology.
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Contact Emma Martinez via email: emma.martinez@pepperdine.edu or by Instagram: @emmamartinezreports
