Perspectives

With Valentine’s Day quickly approaching, you might have noticed that the number of couples polluting the Malibu campus seems to be skyrocketing rapidly. While I’m simply brimming with joy for those of you who’ve at last found a kindred spirit in this desolate wasteland of romantic selection, I must inquire whether it’s entirely necessary to spend each beautiful reunion between … [Read more...] about Student offers tips to help dodge dicey ex run-ins

On-campus housing started so well. We all bounded up the hill with our luggage and NSO nametags to find that the “Dorms Like Palaces” ranking from Princeton Review hit it right on the nose. If you lived on Lower Dorm Road, you could watch baseball games on your way to class and the sun sinking into the ocean on your way back. If you lived on Upper Road, well, the hills of … [Read more...] about Cheers to fresh housing options and slashed pricing

It’s that time of the semester again. Sniffley-faced peers are snatching up Jamba immunity boosters in yesterday’s sweats and glaring at the sunshine outside as if it were mocking their very existence. While crummy diets and irregular sleep schedules get the blame for typical college student sickness, researchers last week reported that poor physical health can now be linked to … [Read more...] about Sick and tired? Detoxify your relationships

The world has been both blessed and plagued by nationalism for the better part of 300 years. This modern manifestation of collective ethos is not merely political or cultural in nature. It transcends these ideas, instead standing as an emblematic border of shared sentiments. The swelling of pride and patriotic feeling is felt all around the world, and the United States does not … [Read more...] about Humility yields exceptionalism

The harsh reality of first world problems weighs heavily over the hills of Malibu. No longer able to avoid the piles of homework accumulating around campus, students skulk sheepishly back toward the library, swimsuits concealed under bulky blue and orange sweatshirts. Payson triumphs, swarming with frantic students, at last disillusioned as to what their semester social … [Read more...] about Filthy roommates hinder life in all its fullness