CARA VAN METER
Assistant Art Editor
Welcome to Pepperdine, froshy people, transfers and returnees alike. The new semester sits on the horizon spotless and shiny, full of endless possibilities: new classes, new professors, new crayons — hmm, scratch that last bit — a new semester anyway, a new room, and for many of you a new roommate. There are five easy steps you can follow to ensure shared space bliss between you and your roomie — or at least to gain a comfortable tolerance.
There are four species of roommates. “Blind roommates:” common among freshmen, it comprises of those who have never met before; Acquaintances:” roommate pairs who may have known of one another before coming to college but never actually knew one another; “Pre-Pepperdine pals:” bosom buddies, but they never actually had to share a room; “Domestic duos:” the most experienced in the world of roommating, they have roomed with each other before and learned each other’s little quirks.
Now that you have discovered which type of roommate you have, get to know each other on a more specific level. The first week of school can be time crunch with that crazy whirlwind of events, classes and CLOMs, but it is vital that you find a couple of hours to spend with just your roommate.
Head to Malibu Yo for some tasty frozen treats and quality conversation, or just hang out in your new room as you ponder how to decorate (see next week’s How To for more helpful tips). Wherever and whenever, make time to actually talk to each other.
This is particularly essential for “blind roommates” and “acquaintances.” Get past the small talk environment your roommate has been used to.
In the course of carrying out Step One, you should have come across some common ground between you and your roommate (if you didn’t, go back and repeat step one). Now use that common ground to your advantage.
For instance, if you both like a particular band, have a midnight jam session in your room or go to a concert together. If you and your roomie share a love of fashion, shop together. If you’re both car nuts, cruise together. These “common ground” activities will help you learn to be comfortable with one another.
Don’t mistake Step Four for an order to split everything straight down the middle. It’s important to set boundaries and to speak up if you would prefer that your roommate not drink your sodas, for example. However, the room or apartment you’re living in is something that you must share.
When your roommate is sick or has to study for a major final, don’t throw a party in the room. On the same token, if you’re a quiet homebody who doesn’t like to have company, it’s only fair to remove yourself to the library once in a while so that your roomie can invite friends over without treading on your toes.
Zealously friendly roommates often overlook this step, but it is crucial in all relationships, especially those that involve shared living space. No matter how much you love your pre-Pepperdine pal or the other half of your domestic duo, you have to create and maintain a personal space/time bubble. Spending every waking minute together with your roommate will make you both edgy, and you’re likely to grow tired of one another. Take time out each week to hang out with other friends and also to hang out with just you.
Finally, the best tool you can use in building a working roommate relationship is respect. Be courteous and considerate of one another. Be straightforward about your own needs and expectations, and when your roommate makes a reasonable request, do your best to honor it. By treating one another with respect, you can keep your semester shiny and your roommate relationship sparkling for a long time.
8-28-2006
