Dear Grace,
What are some creative ways to ask someone to my formal? Everyone else seems to have done something brilliant; should I even bother trying to top them?
Sincerely,
Seeking Inspiration
Dear Seeking Inspiration,
Formal season is indeed upon us, and with it, the disproportionately huge pressure to make your invitations clever, unique and unforgettable. I remember a time back in 2009, a time when I too lost hours of sleep in a feeble attempt to whip up a formal invite so adorable, so effortlessly cool, that my prospective date would have no choice but to accompany me. Then I realized how much effort I was putting into my “effortless” idea, how dumb it really was and then some kid came into my chapter with a time-stop video and a live band and two dozen roses and a four-part harmony to ask one of my sisters — and that’s when I gave up. It’s just formal. So for those of you out there who can’t play the guitar or sing or dance or drop $200 on a convoluted plan to guilt trip whomever you’re asking into saying yes, take my advice: keep it simple.
No. 1: Post a picture on Facebook
The beauty of the Facebook post is that it’s public enough for people to see that you put some effort (albeit minimal) into your invite while simultaneously erasable in the event that your date refuses you. Grab a Sharpie and a piece of construction paper and jot down “Formal?”, run your fingers through your hair and proceed to take as many shots of yourself in PhotoBooth as necessary for you to look decently groomed, and swallow any shame you may associate with the concept of selfie. If you haven’t received any likes, any texts or any responses within, say, 45 minutes, it’s safe to say you should quickly delete the post and never speak of it again.
No. 2: Shoot them a text
My personal favorite formal invite comes in the form of a concise, affordable and readable message. It’s impersonal, deletable, private and distanced enough not to make you look bad if all goes wrong. If all goes well, you will receive a prompt, positive response. In the event of failure, pull a seventh grade move and invent a story about someone stealing your phone, drunken texts, etc. Come on, we’ve all done it. Or perhaps that’s just me.
No. 3: Write to me about it
Always desperate for copy with which to fill this very column, I can guarantee an unpublicized ask if indeed you contact me in an attempt to ask your date. With a readership of roughly 11 people, this page is the ideal place to put your ad. Thrust the person a copy of the Graphic, highlight the headline and walk briskly in the opposite direction. If you are refused, I promise to take the hit for you. If not, my readership may double to 22. It’s a win-win — or something.
