ARIES — Gemini will borrow money from you soon. Take his or her Facebook password as collateral.
TAURUS — Bring some holiday cheer to your living space. String Christmas lights around your room.
GEMINI — Borrow some money from your closest comrade and blow it at the racetrack. A true friend will let you go double or nothing.
CANCER — Scorpio’s watching you sleep. Better keep the lights on.
LEO — Your next joke will end up hurting someone. Tell it twice.
VIRGO — Pisces needs your help. Don’t judge and bring a shovel.
LIBRA — Your future is clouded. Best not to take any action whatsoever.
SCORPIO — You’ve been forgotten by your friends. Remind them you exist by watching them sleep.
SAGITTARIUS — Tell Libra you know his or her future. Make sure you mention the bit about the baby shower.
CAPRICORN — One of Leo’s jokes will take you down a notch. At least you have your health?
AQUARIUS — Cram a holiday fruit cake into Taurus’ campus mailbox. ‘Tis the season!
PISCES — Don’t worry. We all make mistakes. Virgo’s prepared to do the dirty work.