Virgo
No, you cannot have that pint of ice cream.
Scorpio
Why go out when you can stay in? No one ever regrets the nights they marathon their favorite shows.
Capricorn
If you think you’re too out-of-practice to play Temple Run, don’t worry — your muscle memory has you covered.
Pisces
Don’t forget to pay your bills this month.
Taurus
Children don’t like you.
Cancer
Buy some crayons and coloring books. It’s amazing how relaxing coloring can be.
Libra
Save time in the morning by brushing your teeth while you shower. Or shower while you brush your teeth.
Sagittarius
The tickets are cheap and you really want to go, so do yourself a favor and go.
Aquarius
Just because procrastination has worked up until now doesn’t mean it’s always going to work.
Aries
Invite your friends over for dinner and figure out which one is scheming to destroy you.
Gemini
Not all arguments are 50/50. There are right and wrong answers.
Leo
“Breaking Bad” may have ended, but the “Sons of Anarchy” still ride on.
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As published in the Oct. 3, 2013 issue of the Pepperdine Graphic.
