Scott Trevathan
Staff Writer
The first week of school is always an enjoyable time for me because it is practically the only time that I enjoy going on campus. This year it has been a little difficult for me to take full advantage of my rigorous 13-unit schedule. I don’t know if it is the total lack of parking that is a result of all the 12-year-old looking freshmen driving around, or if it is the fact that I can’t even find parking at my own apartment complex (the poorly run Malibu Bella Mar apartments), but I am just not ready to get back into the swing of things. As a result of not going to all of my classes this week, I have had some free time to reflect on some of the early misfortunes of the 2004-2005 school year — hopefully I am not the only one that has noticed these things.
To start things off, let’s have a little chat about the Business Division. Not only is my major possibly being cut out of the academic program, even though the number of International Business majors has nearly doubled in size over the past eight years, but now I can’t even walk in the back doors of the Center for Communication and Business.
Everyone needs to thank those pathetic losers who stole the computers from the CCB last year — I have been saving the extra sweat that my body has been producing from the increased walk to the front door of the CCB in a jar, and I am going to pour it all over the people who have caused this atrocity.
For some reason those brilliant number-crunchers in the Admissions Office keep letting in more and more freshmen every year. You think that they would get the point when people are being forced to park down by the tennis courts on PCH just so that they can attend the first Convocation of the year. Maybe the best solution to the huge parking problem is not to allow freshmen to have cars. I am totally for increasing tuition by $75 so that every freshman receives a pair of hip, new Rollerblades so that they can skate around campus. I can just picture myself camped out by the huge staircase by the baseball field with an ice-cold soda watching people attempt to Rollerblade down to Convocation. I know that this sounds like a great idea, but we have to remember the reason why freshmen are allowed to have cars — that’s just more people that can receive parking tickets from Public Safety. Even though laughing at people when they try to stop from Rollerblading off the side of Dorm Road sounds funny, I wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardize the jobs of those Public Safety officers.
The last thing that I want to touch on is the loss of a great friend and a great basketball player. Everyone knows Terrance Johnson will not be with us this basketball season because of academic reasons (even though somehow all of those baseball players seem to pass their classes). I now have lost the only legitimate basketball player that I am not afraid of talking trash about in my basketball articles, so it’s a good thing I can still rip on all of those sub-par players. I wonder whom Coach Westphal will assign to play defense against Terrance on Nov. 9 when Pepperdine plays an exhibition game against Cal Baptist.
I am going to close with a little piece of advice for Coach Westphal straight from the great Terrance himself — “If they try to make Chase Griffin guard me, I am going to score 100 points.” Hopefully the coach will listen. It would certainly be entertaining.
09-09-2004