Elizabeth Reinking
Staff Writer
I have a confession to make. I know I may seem like just your average slightly odd Pepperdine student, but in fact I lead a secret double life. Hi, my name is Elizabeth, and I am an online stalker.
OK, it’s not quite as creepy as it sounds. I’m not going to appear on your local evening news anytime soon. See, I am addicted to online journals. I collect them like some people collect stamps, or boy band memorabilia. I can’t be stopped. Livejournal, Xanga, Blogger – if you have one, I will find you. Then I will check obsessively for updates, upwards of three or four times a day. Yes, it is disturbing. I did say it was an addiction.
It all began innocently enough. My sister told me one day about her new Livejournal. The idea sounded intriguing so I started reading hers every once in a while. Once in a while then turned into every day, whether or not she had actually updated. Then I discovered the “Friends” page, which shows the journal entries of everyone my sister knows who has a Livejournal (Or LJ, as they are called by those in the know). Then I could check all of their “Friends” pages. It all went downhill from there.
I then became fixated on discovering whether anyone else I knew had online journals. Slowly but surely, my collection grew. I made a whole little folder of them, to make it more efficient to check them all at one time. Many of my friends and acquaintances displayed their online journal links proudly on their AIM profiles, making it easy to locate them. But with others, the process was not so simple. For them, it took persistence, dedication, and some hardcore investigative journalism.
A few I got from good old-fashioned eavesdropping. I am a dropper of eaves from way back. Seriously, you need to be careful having conversations near me because odds are, I’m listening. My ears may be abnormally small (no, they really are – like little dried apricots stuck on each side of my skull), but at the first hint of something scandalous or something involving online journals, they perk right up. But that method only worked for people with whom I am still in contact.
For the rest, including old high school classmates, I went all out. After trying several different methods, I discovered that, in true Kevin Bacon style, pretty much everyone I know is connected to everyone else I know through some combination of online journals. I was able to find almost anyone, even my old high school nemesis. Apparently she’s gained 30 pounds, and no, I feel no guilt in taking perverse pleasure in that.
The problem with my addiction, though, is that I can’t really admit to that guy I had French with two semesters ago that I read his Livejournal every day. All I do is smile and wave at the guy when we pass in the Caf. It would seem a little odd were I to suddenly ask how his sister is dealing with the death of their family iguana. Don’t get me wrong, I really want to know. But I have to pretend that all I know about him is that he can’t remember the right past participle conjugation for “to be.”
It’s even harder for my friends who don’t know I read their online journals. I suppose I could just admit to them that I’m a fan. But the best part about them not knowing I read their journals is that sometimes, they write about me. It’s such a rush. I can’t give that up, even knowing that someday my snooping will surely come back to haunt me.
The main problem is that eventually, I start forgetting what I know because of the online stalking and what I know because of actual conversations with my friends. The line becomes very blurry, and I have to be careful not to ask them about something that they never told me about in the first place. It’s a lot to keep track of, and I’d say that it’s stressful, but come on. These are online journals we’re talking about, not Middle East peace negotiations.
While writing this column, I actually paused in the middle to check my friend’s Web site and see if she had updated her journal. She hadn’t, but that won’t stop me from checking again before I go to bed. Do you have an online journal? Maybe you should go update it, because odds are I’m already a fan.
10-28-04
