For Olivia Bates, senior year has presented a plethora of hardship and change.
On one particularly bad day, Bates turned down a job offer for an executive development program at Macy’s in Washington, D.C., because she believed she had a different vision and vocational calling in her life. But letting the opportunity go was challenging, as it left her post-grad future uncertain.
Just a week later, Bates went through a breakup.
Bates said she leaned on her mother and her friends to be lifted through both bad days and ultimately found clarity through their support.
“I had a lot of really, really, really, really bad days and I think that all of that change would have been impossible without my friends,” Bates said.
Bad days can often be nonlinear and difficult to face alone, but Pepperdine students said they are actively turning their bad days around by shifting their perspectives, leaning into their relationships, engaging in movement and practicing gratitude.
Navigating the Bad Days
Connie Horton, vice president for Student Affairs, said when students are having a bad day, they should always remember that they have a choice on how they choose to handle the emotion or situation. Sometimes, shifting one’s perspective can make a bad day better.
“Negative thoughts are going to come, you’re dwelling on something for a minute that’s going to come,” Horton said. “But I do have control whether I camp there.”
Through her work in the Resilience-Informed Skills Education (RISE) program, Horton and her team remind students that even though they may be worried about their academics or an exam, everything will be OK.
“There’s some big things in life, but most things aren’t big,” Horton said.
Bates said through her past experiences and hardships, she has learned to feel every emotion and advises other people to do the same.
“I’ve started seeing emotions like storms,” Bates said. “Sadness is real and it will happen but let it pass instead of trying to stop being sad or fight it or to cope unnecessarily.”
Bates said as a nondenominational Christian, when she is having a bad day, she also turns to her faith by engaging in Scripture and worship music. She said when she hyperfixates on certain situations in her life, she has learned to focus on God’s plan instead.
“I love God and I surrender to Him and I trust Him,” Bates said. “He’s working for the good of those who are called according to His purpose. And so it’s going to be OK.”
Sydney Wilson, a senior Psychology major, and Mireya Galacgac, a senior Sports Medicine major, are co-presidents of the Student Wellness Advisory Board, which promotes health and wellness on campus for students.
Galacgac said playing the piano has been helpful on her bad days. She grew up playing but stopped once she came to Pepperdine due to having a smaller space.
During her sophomore year abroad in Vevey, Switzerland, she rediscovered her love for the piano after finding a music room in Pepperdine’s abroad campus.
“I would find myself in there almost every night or during our lunch breaks,” Galacgac said.
Galacgac said she has noticed playing makes her feel good because she is able to step away from the outside world through playing random songs she heard that day or comfort songs.
“It almost feels like time just slips away,” Galacgac said. “It’s nice to have that space for myself.”
Wilson said being away from her family in Pennsylvania has challenged her to get through bad days alone, without her close support system.
“I’ve definitely learned how to manage bad days more, turn on [a] new leaf and grow up instead of ruminating and letting it affect my week,” Wilson said.
Oftentimes, for Wilson, simply watching something from the comfort of her room can aid in getting through a bad day.
Wilson said she distracts herself from life by immersing herself into a movie or a sci-fi TV show like “Severance” on Apple TV.
“It’s such a different world that it makes you think a lot,” Wilson said. “Kinds of shows like sci-fi or cartoons shake your mind off problems you have going on.”
Wilson said she prefers to watch “Severance” rather than reality TV because she is able to separate herself from relatable content.
However, on days when she is feeling heavier emotions, she visits the Counseling Center.
“That’s a resource I use sometimes, especially for things that are a bit more anxiety inducing and take up more of my negative mind space,” Wilson said.
The Impact of Personal Relationships
Having a strong support system on bad days can provide comfort, love and a sense of community when life feels overwhelming.
Wilson said joining SWAB has been one of the best decisions she has made at Pepperdine. She has gained helpful skills through the wellness education and seeing other SWAB members benefit from helpful practices like meditation and exercise.
“I feel like I behave so differently now because I see these benefits,” Wilson said. “I’m like, Wow, maybe I should try that.”
Bates said she feels grateful for the friends she can text or call at any time. She said supporting her friends is equally important because it allows her to have deep conversations and step away from her personal problems.
“My friends are the best part of my life,” Bates said. “Hearing about them takes me out of my own headspace and I love serving my friends in that way.”
For Horton, her family is everything. She said spending time with her loved ones, like her grandsons, husband of 38 years and calling her daughter in Philadelphia makes a big difference.
Finding Beauty in Exercise and the Outdoors
Senior Psychology major Diana Gordon said when she is having a bad day, she likes to take a break from her devices and do something in nature with her friends.
“Being off my phone, off my laptop, just kind of taking a step out of the social media world really helps,” Gordon said.
Gordon finds that going to Alumni Park with her closest friends to talk about what may be bothering them that day, playing music and doing random yoga poses are effective ways to get her through the bad days.
The weight of bad days often depend on situations, emotions and one’s busyness, Wilson said. When she has more time, Wilson focuses on her mental or physical health by taking advantage of Pepperdine’s gym or workout classes, like the yoga and spin classes.
Galacgac said she prefers being alone when turning to an active outlet.
“What I normally do is something active, so I usually find that exercising of some sort is a good stress reliever,” Galacgac said.
For Galacgac, running is a mindless activity. She feels a strong connection to the exercise because she played sports in high school and has ran half marathons and 5Ks in the past.
Running in particular brings her the most peace and closer to nature.
“I enjoy running along the beach, especially during the sunset,” Galacgac said. “I can just stand there and kind of soak it all in.”
Practicing Gratitude
Putting situations into perspective is something everyone should practice because there is always something to be grateful for, Horton said.
“Even on the worst days, there’s something to be grateful for,” Horton said. “I’m grateful this day is over, that I have people in my life who care if I’m having a yucky day.”
Horton said that when she begins to dwell on a situation or feeling, she reminds herself that many would love to be in her place.
“My bad days are people’s dream days,” Horton said. “Think about what other people carry, think about how much control I have in my life.”
Gordon said that when she is having a bad day, she reminds herself of the beauty within her relationships.
“If I’m having a bad day and I miss someone, I just think of how beautiful it is to have the opportunity to love whoever it is I’m missing,” Gordon said.
It can be difficult to stop ruminating on emotions throughout a bad day and not let it affect the rest of the week. However, Galacgac said she turns to gratitude when she feels herself ruminating.
“Being grateful for your surroundings and where you are and kind of trying to put into perspective, ‘Guess this is a bad day, but look at all the past good days that you’ve had that have brought you to this moment right now,'” Galacgac said.
Wilson said when students are struggling, they should seek out resources on campus like RISE, SWAB and the Counseling Center.
“There is always somebody there for you,” Wilson said.
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Contact Viviana Diaz via email: viviana.diaz@pepperdine.edu
