Virgo
Write that strongly worded letter you’ve been meaning to write. You will be surprised by how far it actually goes.
Scorpio
It’s time for you to bring Pogs back to the national dialogue.
Capricorn
Hayao Miyazaki is retiring. Depending on your perspective, mourn the loss or celebrate the career with a Studio Ghibli movie marathon.
Pisces
Always wear pants when walking on grass, especially on hot days. You never know when an innocent bug bite on the leg can turn into flesh-eating bacteria.
Taurus
Take a step closer toward becoming the person you’re meant to be, which is inevitably your mom.
Cancer
A great way to learn money management skills is by playing “The Simpsons: Tapped Out” on your iPhone. It will not help you with your time management skills.
Libra
“Natural” makeup is asinine. Go big or go home and save your money.
Sagittarius
Try one last time to get into jazz. You might have finally acquired the taste for it.
Aquarius
Generosity is the best policy. Unless it’s Häagen-Dazs. That’s $5 a pint! Don’t share that.
Aries
Color-coding all your notes — efficient study organization or a waste of energy? It’s a perfect week to find out.
Gemini
If you have political bumper stickers on your car, take them off. You live in California — they’re pointless here.
Leo
Take the road less traveled. Unless you’re a follower, in which case, as your leader, I’m telling you to take the road less traveled.
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As published in the Sept. 5 issue of the Pepperdine Graphic.