It might be the greatest time of the year, but going back home for the holiday may include having to deal with some not so great family members. “How is school?” “Are you dating someone?” “What are your plans after college?” “You look fat/thin.” “When are you going to get a real job?” Whether it stems from love or not, it is not fun to feel criticized by anyone, but especially your own flesh and blood. It can be understandable that you just want to take your turkey and mashed potatoes to take cover in your bedroom to enjoy your Thanksgiving dinner in peace.
Instead of criticizing your own life, try to bring up more controversial issues that will distract your family members from your personal failures. Abortion, immigration, Trump’s wall, gun control, bring up everything and anything. Instead of talking about you, your family members will move on to condemning the federal government or the opposing political party. Better them than you. Every man and woman for themselves during the holiday season. Who knows, maybe you’ll even start an intellectual family-friendly debate about our nation’s top issues.
Another fun idea is to use the holiday weekend to pick up learning a new language to distract yourself from your less-likeable family members. If you’re going studying abroad in the future, this is a great time to get a head start. Download the iPhone application Duolingo and learn some Thanksgiving-fitting words to get you through the weekend. To really have some fun, speak in your foreign language of choice the entire dinner. If they can’t understand you, they can’t talk to and bother you! It’s evolutionary, really.
And if all else fails, you can just stuff more food into your face every time a family member asks you an uncomfortable question. You can see this as a two-for-one, avoiding answering their questions and finding another excuse to eat more food. To help you out with this, stuffing brand Stove Top is selling Thanksgiving pants, where the waistband stretches to two-times its original size, allowing for plenty of room for a second, or maybe even a third, serving.